The Worst Cab Driver I’ve Ever Had

I picked up this woman downtown.  She said where she was going and nothing else.

Most passengers said nothing.  And I said nothing.  And we both liked it that way.

I drove the woman all the way to her place before she spoke again.

“You’re the worst cab driver I’ve ever had.”


“You didn’t say a word to me.  Cab drivers are supposed to talk to their passengers.”

I didn’t tell her about all the other passengers who would disagree.  Instead I felt terrible.

“Sorry,” I said.

“You,” she said, “you need to learn.”

“You’re right.  I’m sorry.”

Then she stared at me to make sure her anger went deep inside.  So it would never leave.

I hadta go straight to the Outback Saloon after that.

A guy from the open mics happened to be there.  He’d eventually have a lot of success as a musician.  I told him what happened.

“People are fucked up,” he said.

“Yeah,” I said

“You shoulda told her she was full of shit.”

“I know,” I said and ordered another drink.

I was soothed for the moment, but it wasn’t the last time something like that happened.  Maybe they didn’t always call me ‘the worst.’  But they’d think I was ‘bad.’

Bad cab driver

Bad coworker

Bad roommate

Bad friend

Bad lover

Bad teacher

Bad writer


It’s something people do.

Even if they don’t have a good reason.  Even if others tell me I’m good at those things.

It’s something people do.

And believing them for a moment is something I do.


taken by Steve Valdek at Kinky Mink video shoot 1/13

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